NEWSFLASH! - Black Friday actually shit


A leading economic think tank has published research indicating that 'Black Friday' is in fact....shit.

'Conclusive??'  a globally respected think tank based in Market Harborough, used a logarithm to track the prices of 100 popular consumer goods in the 3 weeks leading up to 'BF' and found that there was on average a 1144% increase in the price of the goods leading up to Black Friday.

"While consumers might THINK they are on to a bargain come 24th November when faced by a plethora of '75% Off!' signs the sad reality is that they are, in fact, being royally shafted!" commented Laughton Foxton, Consclusive??'s acting head of HR (Maternity Cover).

"Essentially Black Friday is all about consumers paying over the odds to get sweaty and barge into people" continued a slightly troubled Foxton..."A similar experience to paying £50 for a 'Rage against the Machine' comeback tour.

Representatives of Rage against the Machine were unavailable for comment.

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