NEWSFLASH! - Government issues 'Montage Warning; ahead of Sport Personality of the Year


In an unprecedented step the Government has today issued a Category 5 Puce 'Montage Advisory Warning' ahead of the BBC's 'Sports Personality of the Year' Awards, live from Liverpool's Echo and the Bunnymen Arena tonight.  

     "Having consulted with media specialists, we feel duty-bound to alert viewers of the potential     adverse mental effects of sitting through endless montages which blatantly squeeze every last potentially emotional imaged from the 4 sporting events that the BBC actually managed to snaffle this year - World Athletics, Skeleton Luge, Rutland U15 football championship play offs and 'Paper, Scissor, Stone' (Hungarian Ladies U50)............a Government spokesman, spoke.

    "We have also consulted with medical practitioners who have diagnosed 'JustShowtheBloodyclip....itis' as an actual medical thing the spokesman spoke further.

In related news, rumors that sinister Putin-loving, hacking dudes 'Funky Bears' are using sinister logarithms and all that schazaam to influence the SPoTY voting have seen Chris 'Rollercoaster' Froome's odds go from 2-1 at the start of the week, to 2000000000000000000000-1 on Friday, to odds on favorite earlier on.



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